Child of Dust

My head seems to be constantly spinning with thoughts these days. Everywhere I go, everything I read, everyone I talk to: it’s a never ending flow of conversation with God, others, and myself. Here’s a few:

1)      Liminality – My friend Noah wrote about this in his blog, but it’s the concept of being “in between” when it comes to social, cultural, political, or anything-al situations of life. Essentially, it’s a combination of being in transition, and giving yourself over to something new amidst living in the old. I believe this is what it means for us to be living into the story of Christ and the Kingdom of God. I believe this is what it means to have a dual nature and live both in the Spirit and flesh. I believe living in a state of liminality causes growth and repels stagnation. I believe it’s a beautiful place to be.

2)      World Vision – I picked up my friend, Kristin, from the airport today to both aid her in getting back home, as well as discuss her job working for World Vision. She has been with them for a year now, and we talked about that process and what it means for me and my situation. I love the homeless. I’m in love social justice on a domestic scale and enjoy walking around my backyard to quench both that conviction and longing. I don’t feel called to international missions, at least not right now. This then had me thinking, “You know what? This whole World Vision gig sounds great. And you know what else? That’s because it is. It’s prestigious and adventurous and good-natured and edifying and theologically founded and an ideal place to work. It’s also a foundational source for my pride where I can pick up a nameplate and wear it on my shirt as people admire from afar. ‘Chris Kyle? Oh yeah, that kid works for World Vision now. Doing great stuff, that’s for sure. What a cool guy!’ ”

I talked about letting dreams die a while back, and I think this is one of them. It was certainly short lived, but I think that’s simply because God exercised His grace much faster than He normally does with me. It will resurrect if the time is right, but with a foundation this impure, I’d better wait a while. Where to next, Lord?

3)      Romans 15 – You looking for some conviction in your life? Then read the first couple verses of this chapter. It reminded me of one of the first things I learned from my SMC staff two years ago: “I already have enough, don’t worry, so please let me give to you.”

4)      Fear – Don’t be afraid to believe that God is as great as He says He is. And when you actually do, tell me, because I’d like to know what it’s like.

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~ by Chris Kyle on October 6, 2010.

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