My last class of the day was Survey of Western Philosophy, a course I signed up for freshman year but dropped because the text was too difficult to read. It was nostalgic sitting in the same room, three years later, where I had no sense of timidity or reluctance to speak up. As I sat there I began thinking about what it would be like to have my old self converse with who I am right now, and what my past would thinking of me presently.

I feel as if my older self would be in awe of the wisdom and experience I’ve gained, but at the same time possibly disappointed with the innocence and starry-eyed curiosity I’d lost. I remember freshman year soaking in the words of my professors as each sentence spoken seemed like a treasure I’d just uncovered. Nowadays, quips seem far and in between, but nonetheless striking. I also recall the willingness to impress for the sake of my newly forming identity, whereas now I’m more focused on what crucial knowledge I should know in order to succeed in the life that’s coming.

This whole freshman year throwback thing had me thinking about mentorship as well, and if I should get involved this year for a freshy. I’ll need to be praying about that more if I’m actually serious about it.

I think I ran 4 miles today. Kim Walker was on repeat. I want to run a half marathon by the end of the year. Perhaps Robie Creek once again…


~ by Chris Kyle on September 27, 2010.

2 Responses to “Backdraft”

  1. you should write a letter to yourself in ten years. that way you don’t have to imagine what you’d say way back when…you can be intentional about wanting to remind older chris what 21-year old chris has learned thus far.

  2. will you keep it for me?

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